Lonely Hearts

Lonely hearts columns here are a hoot. They are in most of the daily papers and are abundant in the Sundays. My favourite was;

“Unemployed HIV positive taxi driver seeks white woman for love and financial assistance.”

Endearingly honest but I can’t imagine he was inundated with replies.

The reality here is that a relationship with a mzungu is a passport to wealth. Being middle aged (and therefore fairly obviously past providing anyone with the mzungu baby they so strongly desire) I’m relatively protected, except for the questions about whether I have a sister they might be able to marry. Most of my female friends here are much younger and are pestered terribly. Offers of marriage are plentiful, even for those already wed, “It’s OK, I can be your African husband”. Petra has clocked up the most proposals (and propositions) of anyone I’ve ever met. She has lost count, but literally dozens, and she tells me thirty good ones, including two brothers who told her they were happy to share. The best prospect offered 300 cows for her hand in marriage, although she never saw the colour of his money…..(Petra is in the picture... Murchison Falls in the background.)