Buying shoes

Mark needed new trainers. Playing tennis on a clay court wreaks havoc on your footwear, apparently. He hates shopping, anywhere. I find it quite entertaining in Uganda so volunteered to go. I headed for the ‘sportswear zone’ of central Kampala. My purchase went something like this;

Hello, how are you? I’m fine, how are you? I’m fine.

I’d like to buy some trainers in a size 43 for my husband.

These are a size 40, is that OK? No, they’ll be too small.

Then what about these, they are a size 46? No, they’ll be too big.

But not too too big? Yes, too too big.

Then what about these, they are size 43? No, they are pink and have ‘Fame’ in glitter on them, he won’t like them.

Yes, they are OK, they are size 43, you can buy these. No, he won’t wear them. Do you have any others in size 43?

Then what about these? Yes, these ones are good. Are they genuine or a Chinese copy?

No, (shocked) of course they are genuine, they are second hand! I don’t want second hand trainers.

But, madam, second hand is the best quality, genuine product, it’s best to buy second hand. I know, normally I agree with you, but not trainers. I want new ones.

I finally settled on a pair of black Nikes, size 43. Genuine (I think). New (ditto, although admittedly no box and only £18 - but they looked and smelled new).

Job done.